Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Confession Time...

....I prefer shaved to groomed. I prefer myself and my husband shaved. There is nothing worse to me than to get a hair in my mouth while I am down on the hubby.

With that said I must also confess I am the worst shaver in the known universe. I can go weeks on end without caring about how my "China" (as our dd calls it) looks. Sometimes I have the attitude of "I'm still getting some. I am married. Who in the hell cares if I have a pubic gnome?" Then there are other times I have this almost obsessive compulsion to shave. I must shave, wax, trim, pluck, or bleach every single hair from my waist down. However since I never have time to do ALL of those things I usually obsess myself sick with wonder over them and then go weeks without caring.

It is a vicious cycle.

I have no idea how to stop it. I can't get every hair and HOLY JEEZ does it hurt like hell to nick anywhere down there. Not to mention the damn itchy grow back stage. Why the hell does anyone even bother?

I guess, I bother mostly because in the end I feel sexy. I feel sexy at the end of the day. After caring for kids and dealing with appointments and commitments and life I feel sexy. I feel like I am worth looking at. I want to be caressed and I want to do some caressing of my own. It is hard to believe that this started as a fantasy of my hubby's that I was willing to fulfill. Now it is what makes me feel sexy, and erotic.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

where'd all the sex talk go?

I am having a very hard time finding something to say.
I don't know why.
I have been teasing my husband about being my inspiration. If that is true he certainly is trying his best to inspire.
I just don't have anything to say this week. I suppose I am just not very motivated to post anything sexual.
Yes, sex is a big part of our lives. BUT it isn't the only part of our lives.

We have kids, families, jobs, appointments, and other pressing matters to attend too.

How do you survive the stress of everyday life?

I did find this a week ago: Vibrators through the ages


Friday, October 12, 2007


Ever bet someone $5 that you were right and they were wrong? As a child I did this often, or was at least the bettee. I never paid out nor did I collect. They seemed to be meaningless bets between friends that wanted to be right that they were willing to give up a week's allowance or lunch money to prove they were sure they were right. I still get the offer to bet and I am the better more often than not.

The great thing about betting now is that it is with my husband and there is much more at stake than a measly $5. We bet oral sex. Yep, oral sex. If I am sure I am right and he is sure he is right we will say "I bet you" or "I bet you times 2" (meaning I am so convinced I am right that I am willing to get 2 favors for being so much smarter and worldly than you)

In all honesty I will also use this method to get things around the house done. If I ask the hubby to do the dishes and he says I will get to them tonight I will say "I bet you won't" He is more likely to get up and do them. Funny thing, he hasn't turned this around on me, saying something like "I bet you won't get the kids clothes put away" Boy would he be upping his blow jobs during the week. Assuming, that I would take the bet. Each of us has to accept the terms of the bet before it actually becomes an oral agreement.

The nice thing about our betting terms is we can be in public, or at family functions and say "wanna bet" and know exactly what stakes are on the table. Plus the added little naughtiness of talking about sex in front of the in-laws.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

play hooky

Did your mom ever let you stay home from school just to have a special day with her? Mine did. It didn't happen often. Maybe 3 times that I can remember in all my school years. We would go shopping, or stay home on a cold day, watch movies under blankets and drink hot chocolate. Those times were truly memorable.

Why not play hooky with your spouse? The great thing about calling off work rather than requesting a day off is the spontaneousness of it. You don't have anything planned for the day. The kids are all ready to go to school/caregivers. It is just you and your hubby in an empty house for a few of hours. OR maybe you have kids younger than school age and one of you stays home to care for them. SO WHAT! If they are young chances are there will be a nap. If you have nothing to do, nowhere to be, what does it matter if you get in some nice family time and then some adult time during nap?

Sex during daylight hours is a rare treat in my house. There is something about a middle of the day romp that is super sexy. Less than OK sex before bed, becomes good sex in the middle of the day. Strange how a simple out of the norm romp can turn bad sex to good.

I am not saying to put your life on hold every month or even every 6. Just every so often take an unplanned day for you and your spouse.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

sleeping with your partner

Couples sleeping apart was a subject on the Today show this morning. I was very surprised that 20-25% of married couples choose to not sleep together.
There are so many ways to control the number or reasons for sleeping apart. Why would anyone turn to separate beds? Or in one study, separate rooms! You are in a loving committed relationship. You share your life, hobbies, interests, and family with your partner but you don't mind sleeping apart? I don't get it. I very much agree with psychologist Brenda Wade, there is probably more to it than just snoring.

Sleeping apart really limits your intimate availability. There are plenty of times I have gone to bed not in the mood and the next thing I know I am participating in TOP 10 worthy best sex I ever had.
If there are separate beds do you schedule your intimate times? Spontaneous, unexpected sex keeps the "same old same old" at bay. Let's face it after being married for 10 years I am sure sex gets pretty routine...maybe even 5 years...by sleeping apart you are just keeping sex more routine.
How can you truly feel this is what is best for your marriage? I like knowing that my husband desires me. Everyone likes a surprise every now and then. I just don't see how sleep can take the place of the comfort and love I feel when I get to snuggle up close to my hubby at 3am.

What do you think? Is sleep better than comfort, snuggles, and sex? Is it more common than we think to sleep apart?